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Friday, October 7, 2011

Hair Apparent -- the real BYU QB controversy

hair today...

BYU Quarterback 1st runner-up, now QB royalty Riley Nelson has been compared to the egocentric prince charming in the movie Shrek – at least his hair has.

Nelson is on film swishing his hair to and fro like a Charlie’s angel in white pants. And now he is in print apologizing if his appearance (read – long hair) offended anyone watching the BYU-Utah State game last Friday night.

His fifteen minutes of coiffure is being compared by some to the Dorothy Hamill wedge, or the Jennifer Aniston
Rachel hairdo of yore.

So what inspired Nelson’s style? “The late 80’s, early 90’s… I saw some highlights and have a poster of Jim McMahon in my room,” he said this summer in an interview with
BYU TV Sports

Nelson acknowledged that he had once sported a “buzzed look,” but now, because he is a wannabe surfer, he needs (longer hair) for a little swag,” admitting that “once school starts it’s all gonna hafta go away, so…”

But it didn’t go away, as bazillions of faithful BYU footballers saw against Utah State – the night he was yanked from the sidelines and put in to win the game.

His hair is now gone, snipped, vacuumed up and tossed in the trash.
"People have had some fun with my hair," said Nelson to a reporter on Monday after having looped off enough to keep the fans happy. "By the way, if anyone cares, I apologize for any offense that my appearance may have caused Friday night,” he said.  “There have been some opinions expressed on that, so people have had some fun. But again, I apologize. I was out of line … It got to a point, and just being a dumb, lazy college student, I like to keep it a little bit longer. It got long and then school started. I didn't want to just buzz it off … I apologize."

Offended? Apologize? Who is he kidding? Did BYU’s Sharleen Wells apologize for showing a bit too much upper arm under those lovely crystal sleeve-things on the road to Miss America? Does Mitt Romney say he’s sorry for sometimes unbuttoning two buttons or rolling his sleeves up in an attempt to be the electable “every man?”

BYU’s strict dress code is clear. “Hairstyles should be clean and neat, avoiding extreme styles or colors, and trimmed above the collar, leaving the ear uncovered.”

Well… truth be told, there was a day or two in my BYU days that I didn’t wear socks to class, so I am not the one to point fingers.

There is no me a culpa necessary. Riley Nelson has brought life to what can sometimes be a germ-free end zone, a famous flaw, and a personality to the program with a reputation for being as squeaky clean as his former bouncing and behaving hair.

Nelson has inspired blogs, even those of rival team U of U. USA Today weighed in on his hair. He has his own You Tube video celebrating the last five minutes of the BYU game where he assisted in a come-from-behind win. And while three turnovers in the San Jose game ere three to many for most, the game was won.

Maybe seeing someone’s slight imperfection has endured him to a public waiting for a little humanity and vulnerability.

"If they are laughing at my expense, at least they are laughing" Nelson said with a grin. Now he is hoping that he can get his offence grinning as well.

Now his imperfection is a fashion statement, and short shorts may be next for Nelson. “I think we should bring ‘em back.” He recently commented. “Personally I think you are mobile (with them) defiantly a lot cooler.”

Would Troy Polamalu of the Raiders be, well… Troy Polamalu of the Raiders if he cut his hair?  Would his powers of “being nice” off the field or his powers of “being tough” on the field be diminished by a good trim?  Are Head & Shoulders or Suave shampoos ready to jump corporately onto the BYU bandwagon?

The playing field has been leveled – at least Nelson’s hair has been evened out-ish with his teammate and friend Jake Heaps. Whether Nelson will have the same allure with shorter hair remains to be seen. Perhaps the coaches will have to base the starting QB position on -- you know – ability.

Fans will cheer for whomever gets the job, and will cheer for whomever replaces him should things not be gelling. If the QB answer becomes any less definitive, I myself will watch for the interviewer to ask Nelson if he blow-dries or towel-dries his hair.

If I can’t have my team win definitively, at least we can talk about the QB’s doo.

1 comment:

  1. I remember those sockless ankles with great disdain for such low morals.